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Send your match reports to king@kingcricket.co.uk. If it’s a professional match, on no account mention the cricket itself. If it’s an amateur match, feel free to go into excruciating detail.
Rhys writes:
Wellington experiences a little bit of weather on occasion. Cold weather occurs more often during winter and autumn than during summer. We don’t let this stop us from booking marquee tours in April, though.
I have to work for money at a school, which annoyingly also happens to occur more often during autumn compared to summer.
I am supportive, so let my partner drive me to the Basin Reserve on a Saturday Morning. She drives a 1993 Mini. This car receives a lot of attention from random men. It handles like an airliner touching down at Wellington Airport.
We had to get a warrant of fitness for the car. It did not deserve one. The day’s play began as we waited in line at the mechanics. We were attaching the sun visors to the roof with velcro, because otherwise they flopped down in front of our faces.
After an hour we learned that the car did not pass the warrant. Luckily it made it down the road and we entered the ground.
I had taken with me a small checkered blanket, a bucket hat, no shoes, a pair of shorts and a T-shirt. It was about 9 degrees.
How was the cricket?
The cricket was shit.
That really is a superb match report, Rhys.
I loved the descriptive text, I loved the photographs, I loved every aspect of it…
…until the final question and answer phrases. This felt, to me, like an attempt to bend the submission rules.
But for a first attempt, it was magnificent and I’m sure that, if you try again, your next match report will be even more compliant with the rules.
My own vehicle, Dumbo, who has had several match reports published here in his time, had a most exciting experience on Thursday, when he was granted permission to park in the pavilion/Allen Stand gap at Lord’s and thus look out onto the field of play.
https://www.flickr.com/photos/ianlharris/40709074663/in/dateposted/
Dumbo insisted that I take this photo to show Daisy and all of you. Please note the entire absence of cricket…but no need to point that out to Dumbo.
For those unaware of Dumbo’s cricketing history, he has sought to look out on the field of play at Lord’s ever since his first visit to a cricket match, reported here on King Cricket four years ago, at which Dumbo got to look out onto the field of play:
https://www.kingcricket.co.uk/clontarf-second-xi-v-laois-match-report/2015/08/26/
You caught me! The main point of writing this was, I was on TV once.
How’s the car?
Great stuff, Rhys. Shades of Richard Brautigan’s short stories in there.
Also shorts stories, Edwardian, although regrettably come the crucial moment of fame they were obscured by blanket.