The Great Asitha Fernando?

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There is a void in our life. Ever since The Great Neil Wagner retired, we haven’t had an unsuppressible affection for an ostensibly innocuous Test cricketer who is somehow successful in spite of apparent physical limitations. Asitha Fernando? Could it be you?

The main problem with Sri Lanka’s Test Fernandos is that there are an awful lot of them. The current bowling attack alone boasts a Vishwa as well as Asitha.

Oshada Fernando played last year and we’ve also had a Dinusha, a Hasantha and a Dilhara since the turn of the millennium.

It’s hard to latch onto a player when you’re not even confident they’re Top Fernando.

But that could be changing. This Test has given us greater exposure to Asitha Fernando and he has a couple of things going for him.

  1. Wickets
  2. Physique

At the time of writing, Asitha Fernando has 3-68 to his name, which would be neither here nor there if he hadn’t taken them while being built like Asitha Fernando.

As Vithushan Ehantharajah succinctly puts it, “if you were to design your ideal fast bowler, it probably would not share many physical traits with Asitha Fernando.”

Like The Great Neil Wagner, he is neither tall enough nor quick enough to do the job he does. Unlike Wagner, he also isn’t left-handed enough to offset those limitations.

He is however blessed with what Vish calls, “the Sri Lankan uncle’s paunch”.

So far there are no ingredients for success here, but after 15 Test matches Asitha Fernando’s bowling average sits in the mid-20s thanks to supreme accuracy and the ability to swing it both ways with no discernible change in action.

Cult greatness? We’re probably jumping the gun on that one – but we will at least confidently anoint him ‘Top Fernando’.

In-no-way-made-up King Cricket reader Jenkinson Terryflaps has provided a strong recommendation why you should sign up to get the King Cricket email.

Terryflaps writes: “Ever since I signed up for the King Cricket email in June 2022, I have barely fallen over at all, where previously I was at least moderately prone to minor trips and slips. Separately, my athlete’s foot has also improved considerably – although I concede this may have more to do with the daily soaks.”

OH NO!

Roelof van der Merwe just heard you haven't yet signed up for the King Cricket email...

...so he's on his way to see you!

8 comments

  1. If you’re a Nottinghamshire batsman you could be forgiven for thinking not all that much has changed.

  2. Comments you won’t read this morning on the BBC website:

    “Whilst I’m aware it can rain anywhere, surely there has to be an argument to have less cricket at Southampton, Chester-le-Street, Birmingham, the Oval, Worcester, or Bristol, because of the weather. It’s not the first time and it won’t be the last people have seen no cricket there while there’s play at Old Trafford at in Scarborough”

    1. At the risk of repeating myself by cutting and pasting the comment I just made on the previous piece…

      The irony that today looks like being a washout everywhere in the UK south of the Pennines is not wasted on me.

      Proof positive that Manchester rain is not proper English rain. Weird…just weird.

      1. It wasn’t too bad in Cardiff. Pissed down early on, but brightened up considerably in the afternoon.

        I appreciate that this isn’t really challenging the whole “English rain” side of things.

  3. He shares my birthday so that’s a plus for me. Since Jimmy (one day older) retired, I’ve lost my claim to being younger than an elite cricketer, so I need something.

    The new BBC scorecards, btw, as well as being totally useless at updating the score (their one job), have also renamed N.Madushka as another Fernando, and have no differentiation between all the Fernandos (Fernandoes?) so I think that’s the final nail in the coffin for the Beeb cricket coverage in its current form.

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