Australia

The Australia cricket team is utterly gash

Posted by
< 1 minute read

We’ve been thinking about getting more into reactionary tub thumping of late, so with Australia having been bowled out for 209 by South Africa, we now pronounce them THE WORST CRICKET TEAM IN HISTORY.

This is quite the turnabout, considering that only yesterday they were THE BEST CRICKET TEAM IN HISTORY having beaten South Africa, who themselves had been the best team in history right up until that point. That’s the world of reactionary tub thumping though. It’s a fast-paced diss-a-minute white knuckle ride of short-termist shrieking.

Unless you’re talking about England of course. Even in the world of reactionary tub thumping, they’re still just ‘a bit disappointing’ regardless of what’s happened previously.

OH NO!

Roelof van der Merwe just heard you haven't yet signed up for the King Cricket email...

...so he's on his way to see you!

Similar deliveries:

Default ThumbnailAn Australia team versus a South Africa team – this time it’s international cricket Default ThumbnailHas the Australia cricket team bottomed out? Default ThumbnailEngland are a team utterly without breadth Australia were far and away the funniest cricket team in 2018 – but who was their MVP?

11 comments

  2. In Australia’s defence we did have some help from Bucknor to help us look bad…

    Once again he seems determined to leave his mark on the game, at the expense of the away team.

    Thankfully he retires from tests after this game.

    Maybe some sort of Bucknor retrospective is in order when he finally does retire, perhaps complete with the obituaries for test matches he has murdered?

  3. Dave, get what with the what?

    Wolf, we haven’t seen the dismissals yet, but we’ve always quite liked Bucknor. He’s had some conspicuously bad matches in the last 18 months, but over 128 Tests or however many it’s been, he’s been pretty decent in the main.

    The massive pause before the raised finger has been a repeated highlight.

  4. The Bucknor of the ’90s was class. Unfortunately, he’s been but a shadow of his former self for almost a decade now.

  5. Mahinda> Its sad that the ICC allowed it to happen.

    And surely England are a bit worse than being a bit disappointing.

  6. Absolutely not, Damith.

    In 1999 when England went to the bottom of the world rankings, we were still “a bit disappointing”.

    And even when England won the Ashes in 2005 we remained “a bit disappointing”.

    And now, having thrown away that momentum and sliding down the test rankings once more, the most descriptive phrase I can muster is “a bit disappointing”.

    It is a bit disappointing that England is so consistently mere, but there we are.

  7. Sire, has your RSS feed changed? I no longer seem to get your updates in Google Reader, come to think of it, I no longer get RSS updates from TWC.

    Is google trying to deny my cricket?

    The bastards.

  8. And this is why they never get any momentum, ‘cos we’re always expecting the team to be a bit disappointing, and so they oblige us… It becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

    And that, it has to be said, is a bit disappointing.

  9. Suave, there were attempts at redirecting some of our feeds. The site produces about ten different ones and we’re trying to consolidate them.

    Might be worth subscribing again. Please let us know if there’s a problem though.

  10. this I like. As you know, King, I have a long standing view that things are either GOOD or SHIT, there is no inbetween, no fence upon which to sit.

    Makes things a lot simpler

Comments are closed.