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Alchemy was when they used to try and turn base metals into gold. It was a load of cobblers. Tell you what isn’t a load of cobblers though – Joe Root and Ben Stokes batting together. Quite often when these two substances are combined, true magic happens.
In this year’s Cricket Badger awards, we gave Root and Stokes The White Rabbit Award for their slightly-unhinged efforts at Lord’s against New Zealand. This was when things changed. This was the moment when we all went down the rabbit hole and into Wonderland, away from the horrors we’d long been experiencing in the real world.
On that occasion, the pair delivered a barely-credible rebound, taking England from 30-4 in score terms, but far more importantly the lowest of ebbs in broader terms, to 191-5 – doing so with what should probably be described as something other than ‘panache’ if we could be bothered thinking about it properly.
But sometimes it’s not about being patient and selecting precisely the right word. Sometimes it’s about cracking on and vomiting out a load more words in the hope that the torrent as a whole somehow has more of an impact. Rough and ready, a little bit chancy. Just changing the rhythm and getting things moving really.
Today Root and Stokes were at it again. If Root will get the headlines for what was clearly one of his best hundreds on what so far appears to be a magnificent Test pitch, then credit should also be given for Stokes for being the rockets that launched the Root shuttle for its latest trip beyond the stratosphere.
The partnership was hugely entertaining and enormously valuable. Frankly, you can keep your gold.
That’s what we come to this site for – tenuous attempts to link the final paragraph back to the title. And this was one of your best.
I come here for the sub headings that do this, like ‘wait, we had a point here somewhere’
It’s not true magic if it involves a White Rabbit. Does Stokes eat mushrooms to make it happen?
Is it true magic if it involves a green rabbit?
Alchemically speaking, combining Stokes (St) and Root (Ro) gives StRo, which is the chemical symbol for Strontium (in Finnish or Sanskrit or something). As everyone knows, the most famous version of strontium is Strontium 90. And also as everyone knows, the most famous version of Joe is Joe 90.
That can’t be a coincidence. Joe Root, when combined with Stokes, becomes Strontium 90, which makes him Joe 90, superhero. Expect him to average exactly 90.
Also brings to mind Stroh.
Stroh 80 is 80% ABV.
Stroh 90 would be quite something.
80% of ABDV would be quite a handy middle-order batsman.
Trent Bridge anyone?
Broad is doing that thing where he destroys top orders on his own again, quite a handy party trick.
SA are 48 ahead with three wickets left. That’s only about 60 short of the universally accepted Hardest Total To Chase. It can be done, but not without losing seven wickets in the process.