King Cricket

December 15, 2017 Australia / England

The four stages of Steve Smith’s recurring metamorphosis into a batsman

2 minute readSteve Smith is not a good batsman. Not always. Very rarely, in fact. As far as we can tell, he’s generally only half-decent at the moment bat strikes ball and only very rarely before or afterwards. Here are the four stages Smith passes through for every single delivery he faces.

December 14, 2017 Australia / England

The Waca blunts Australia’s best bowler

2 minute readThe most significant question ahead of the Waca’s final appearance as an Ashes venue was not whether or not it would recover the pace of old – because it clearly wouldn’t – it was whether or not the ball would turn. The Waca is Australia’s most over-hyped pitch and the

December 13, 2017 Australia / England

England are too passionate

2 minute readCan we be the first to accuse them of that? People reflexively go the other way, accusing losing teams of lacking commitment, determination or heart, but it’s almost always the exact opposite. As we’ve written before, passion is not a cure-all. Passion drives you to things like losing all perspective,

December 11, 2017 Match report

England v South Africa Lord’s ODI report from 2008

< 1 minute readGed Ladd writes: A Sunday at Lord’s with Daisy. We sat in the Mound Stand, next to a charming South African gentleman and his Zimbabwean friend. We chatted with them. In particular, the Zimbabwean gentleman explained the currency chaos prevailing in Zimbabwe at that time; sacks full of bank notes

December 9, 2017 Australia / England

If Ben Duckett tipped a drink over someone’s head, here’s what England should do…

< 1 minute readSay so. They should say “Ben Duckett tipped a drink over someone’s head.” This occurred to us while we were watching BBC news this morning and the reporter was listing England’s “alcohol-related incidents.” The terminology conjured a real ‘everything’s totally out of control’ feel, even though at least one of

December 8, 2017 Australia / England

Moeen Ali to get into bowling rhythm by not bowling in warm-up match

< 1 minute readMoeen Ali is the only member of the second Test team who will play England’s latest warm-up match. He will do so because a side strain at the start of the tour left him short of overs. He won’t bowl. England are presumably of the opinion that Moeen will be

December 7, 2017 Australia / England

Three reasons why Australia will more than likely collapse at the Waca

2 minute readAustralia do like to collapse. Amid all the talk of conditions, bowling attacks and Steve Smith’s runsome proclivities, this is the one thing in favour of the tourists. England like to collapse too, of course. They just have to hope that they do it less frequently – or at least

December 5, 2017 Australia / England

Hope can hibernate

< 1 minute readHope never truly dies. It can however recede to the extent that it entirely loses consciousness. It’s safe to say that at around the point Australia emerged for their second innings, hope was in deep hibernation. A little while later it re-emerged after faint rays of Jimmy Anderson had warmed

December 5, 2017 Australia / England

Video: The Barmy Army goad Steve Smith about his use of DRS

< 1 minute readLike most wild animals, The Barmy Army are generally best viewed from afar – ideally on television or at the very least with some sort of robust barrier between you and them. They can also be very funny. Australians sometimes struggle to comprehend that the same bounce that can make

December 4, 2017 Australia / England

Commence the straw-clutching

< 1 minute readGrasp at them. Clutch them. Savour the delightful sensation of straws against palms. England are methodically addressing each of their shortcomings in turn. For some reason the first one they turned their attention to was ‘tail getting blown away by short-pitched bowling’. England’s tail is supposed to be ‘fragile’ compared