Cheteshwar Pujara shows India aren’t short of batsmen

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It’s both sad and joyous that life moves on. Rahul Dravid and VVS Laxman are gone, never to return, but that’s because they’re now middle-aged. Their best cricket is behind them and who wants to look forward to ever-lower high points. Far better to step into the unknown.

Cheteshwar Pujara might never be as good as those pair were, but you never know and not knowing can be half the fun. Anyone who’s spurned a pre-emptive toilet visit ahead of a long journey knows the truth of that.

Based on yesterday’s performance, Pujara’s career promises to be even more entertaining than the Will-I-Won’t-I Piss Myself game. He’ll face tougher challenges than James Franklin’s astonishingly diminished pace, but a Test hundred is never to be sniffed at, if only because all those hours at the crease create a uniquely foetid aroma.

In other news, Suresh Raina was caught behind for three.

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16 comments

  1. Toilet humour, KC, oh dear…

    …and you claim that all is well around here now…

    …I deem this posting redundant and, just like that commenter on your Cricinfo piece earlier this week, I would like my 30 seconds of reading time back…

    …and my 90 seconds of commenting time…

  2. Many of Ravi Shastri’s lines start to make sense to me:

    “That was a quick single”
    “A well-run(ny?) two”
    “He’s cramped for room here”
    “That landed in the corridor of uncertainty”

  3. Slow Cookers = Test Cricket. Microwave = Twenty20. Especially true for “traditional” slow cookers, the kind that would make Geoff Boycott’s mum happy.

    What is “sticky” meat? Gooey as in well-rendered cartilageous material? Try a cut like beef cheeks or short ribs. If you are looking for meat chunks that literally stick together, I suggest water-resistant adhesive. Or Chris Tavare.

    Hope this gives you an opportunity to expound on slow cookers.

    1. Sticky meat is where the cartilageous material begins to dissolve, but then browns and solidifies. It’s somewhere between chewy and gooey.

  4. Err . . . I think I get what you mean. (1) Minimize or eliminate additional cooking liquids, (2) use truly low heat (some slow cookers’ “low” is not low enough), and (3) DO NOT LIFT THE LID TO PEEK. The problem is that if any of the three are breached the result may look like something from “Gozilla vs. Mothra”. Or even if they are not.

    1. We’ve found that in order to get truly sticky results, you need to subsequently use the dry heat of the oven.

    1. Good heavens, that’s quite right.

      This article was actually about Cheteshwar Pujara, not toilets or slow cooking.

      I for one had completely lost sight of that.

      Thank YOU, AP Webster.

  5. Slow Cookers = Test Cricket. Microwave = Twenty20.

    That’s the best analogy ever. For anything. Thank you skchai.

    This is a true story. I watched the T20 finals yesterday with pizza I’d got free the day before in a BOGOF deal, reheated in the microwave. It was… OK. The pepperoni was still there, but it didn’t quite taste as zingy as it had, and the base had gone a bit floppy and chewy. But it was OK.

    I might have had to explain further, but for skchai.

    1. Bert, why throw away that sort of anecdote gold in the comments? That could have been a match report…

      I had a housemate at Uni who never finished his late-night kebabs and heated them up for breakfast the next day, drenched in Salad Cream.

    2. We see nothing wrong with breakfast kebab.

      However, we do have a friend who has more than once slept with a kebab on his chest, facilitating rapid morning access.

    3. It wouldn’t have been acceptable as a Match Report, because the analogy is so good it would fall foul of the “mentioning cricket” rule.

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