< 1 minute readZulqarnain Haider literally says: “leaving pakistan cricket because get bad msg fr 1 man fr lose the match in last game.” But what does he ACTUALLY say? Can anyone help us? What does that mean? Pakistan won their last match, so this Facebook message is a bit confusing. Why has
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Umar Gul and reverse swing
< 1 minute readWe like Umar Gul. He moves like a puppet. That’s always a likeable quality in a person (unless they remind you of Zelda from Terrahawks). Umar Gul is also a brilliant reverse swing bowler. Give him a red ball, he’s mediocre. Give him a new white ball, he’s okay. Give
Continue readingIjaz Butt and the bookies circle
< 1 minute readPakistan Cricket Board chairman, Ijaz Butt, says: “There is loud and clear talk in the bookies circle that some English players were paid enormous amounts of money to lose the match.” What the hell is ‘the bookies circle’? Is it like the women’s institute? Do all the illegal bookmakers of
Continue readingMohammad Irfan conquered by England
< 1 minute readMohammad Irfan is 7ft tall. That makes him a giant. As everyone knows, giants came to our world many millennia ago and have been watching over us ever since, occasionally stepping in when humanity has been in need of help. Sure, Irfan isn’t one of the 19ft tall Moroccan giants
Continue readingYasir Hameed exclusive: he reads the News of the World
< 1 minute readOr he’s read other reports about the News of the World story. Or he’s overheard someone talking about it. Yasir Hameed has been BLOWING THE LID OFF CRICKET CORRUPTION by repeating things he’s read in the News of the World to someone from the News of the World. He’s been
Continue readingGiles Clarke – an unfair but fairly amusing comparison of two pictures
< 1 minute readCharged with massive fraud involving $8bn investment scheme Alleged to have bowled a deliberate no-ball
Continue readingA rousing speech about spot fixing
< 1 minute readFriends, we must take a stand. This great game has been our lifeblood for oh so many years and now is the time to return that favour. Just as cricket sustained us, so must we now sustain it in these times of hardship. This noble game of ours is badly
Continue readingReceiving money for underperformance
2 minute readA man with a pencil moustache approaches King Cricket. Man: Hellooooo. KC: Er, hello? Man: How are you doing this fine day? KC: I’m fine. Sorry, do I know you? Man: No, you don’t know me. But perhaps you should. The man raises an eyebrow and looks King Cricket up
Continue readingHow do you feel about the Pakistan betting scam?
< 1 minute readWe just feel depressed. Cricket is joyful escapism and this kind of thing just knackers it up. Questioning on-field events Assuming it’s true (and having seen Mohammad Amir’s giant no-ball, we’re pretty sure it is) the real damage is in the fact that people question everything that happens in a
Continue readingMohammad Yousuf was banned for life and then retired
< 1 minute readBut he seems okay. It reminds us of the immortal tagline of the entertainingly ludicrous Crank: High Voltage – “He was dead… but he got better.” You can ban Mohammad Yousuf for life and he can retire, but it doesn’t matter, he’ll still be there scoring runs in a Test
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