< 1 minute readPunish them! Rob Key today doled out a punishing barrage of punishment. New Zealand were the unfortunate punishees, punished for being an international team with the temerity to take on The Big Key. “Punish them!” cried the crowd and The Big Key obliged with 178 not out. This would happen
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The Chris Read new hat appeal
< 1 minute readChris writes: “This bugged me last season and it seems it’s going to continue to bug me this season too. “Can I suggest a whip round to buy him a new hat? That’s what, a tenner? So £2 per King Cricket reader.”
Continue readingSteven Finn proves himself completely
< 1 minute readSteven Finn bowled Rob Key for one yesterday. We said that Steven Finn was one to watch this season. How much more right could we be? The answer, of course, is none. None more right. Rob’s been recovering from a virus. This is the only time he is at all
Continue readingWell if you wanted to make Sreesanth cry, mission accomplished
< 1 minute readHarbhajan Singh slapped Sreesanth. Sreesanth had a bit of a cry. This happened because Harbhajan Singh’s a little bit of a dick and because Sreesanth’s also a little bit of a dick. Harbhajan Singh would slap anyone and anyone would slap Sreesanth. It’s a huge surprise that it hasn’t happened
Continue readingAndrew Symonds hits Twenty20 hundred
< 1 minute readAnd this annoys us. When people are throwing huge money around, there’s nothing quite like watching them make a right balls of it. Andrew Symonds sold for $1.35 million and we’d have quite liked him to be a colossal failure. Unfortunately, he’s been okay and even if Deccan Chargers lost
Continue readingMatthew Hoggard does the unthinkable
< 1 minute readMatthew Hoggard smashed someone’s box! That really doesn’t bear thinking about. What are the chances that the delivery was precisely quick enough to smash a box but not quick enough to do any further harm? The chances of that are nil. Thankfully, we haven’t actually seen this. The BBC say
Continue readingDeccan Chargers?
< 1 minute readWhich ones are Deccan Chargers? This is the problem we’re having with the IPL. The teams have no real identities. It’s impossible to remember who’s who. Here’s what we can easily remember: We support Kings XI Punjab. Kolkata Knight Riders is Ganguly’s team, because Ganguly is The Prince of Calcutta
Continue readingWhy Ravi Bopara shouldn’t be discarded
2 minute readRavi Bopara’s Test tour of Sri Lanka was complete toss, with innings of eight and 34 on his debut preceding a grim duck sandwich, with two golden ducks as the bread and an altogether meatier seven ball duck as filling. On that evidence, some people think they’ve seen the back
Continue readingAndrew Strauss murders Surrey
< 1 minute readAndrew Strauss hit 163 off 130 balls for Middlesex against Surrey in the Friends Provident Trophy yesterday. Strauss seems to have remembered what hundreds are and is now getting them in boundaries: 23 fours and four sixes equals 116. This isn’t great news for Rob Key, who even if a
Continue readingReplacing Shane Bond
< 1 minute readYesterday, we suggested that Shane Bond adopt a disguise in order to represent his country. It’s okay, he doesn’t need to. Our scouts have identified four young bowlers who could replace the injury-prone paceman for New Zealand. Ceci has found Ryan Shanebondom: And Andrew Webster, of Spun Out fame, has
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