< 1 minute readWe didn’t actually pay any attention to the cricket at all over the weekend. How should we be punished? By working as Michael Clarke’s ego masseur By working as South Africa’s actual masseur By having to share our lunch with Mark Cosgrove By being the person nominated to let Ian
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Andrew Strauss and Mike Gatting have a go at painting
< 1 minute readNot Michael Vaughan style painting. DIY style painting. We all know how rubbish cricketers are when it comes to DIY. Andrew Strauss probably gets a man in to load the next toilet roll. He doesn’t even know which way he’s supposed to face. At least he’s pointing the brush the
Continue readingAshley Giles has a go at DIY
< 1 minute readFirst Ravi Bopara and Charlotte Edwards, now Ashley Giles. Is the King of Spain any better at DIY than those two charlatans? No. You don’t need to know much about plastering to know that Giles isn’t up to the task. Look at his pristine sportswear. What do plasterers look like?
Continue readingRCBs v DCs match report
< 1 minute readKP goes out to hit catches to children for the Karbonn Kamal Catch between innings. “Have fun,” says Cameron White. “Whatever,” says KP and they fight for exactly two minutes. Then they stop. KP hits the catches, including an easy one for a girl. He looks at Cameron White and
Continue readingSurrey v Lancashire 40-over match report
2 minute readSam writes: Grey skies greeted us on Sunday morning as we prepared to head to Croydon for the first 40 over match of the English domestic season. The day almost got off to a disastrous start. My girlfriend put some potatoes on to boil and told me that in ten
Continue readingA fox being conspicuously partial to cricket
< 1 minute readD Charlton writes: This fox cub was not indifferent to cricket. In fact, he was the opposite: he was different to cricket. So different, in fact, that he wandered into these nets, got tangled up and trapped. Luckily, the cricket club were able to dig out Sussex CCC’s number, who
Continue readingDuckworth-Lewis Method minimum over requirement
< 1 minute readFrank Duckworth says that if there is a problem with his and Detective Sergeant Lewis’s method of deciding rain-affected games, it is in the fact that the ICC deem five overs to be sufficient to constitute a match. We agree. If we could characterise a five-over minimum requirement as Naomi
Continue readingMumbai Indians v Chennai Super Kings, IPL final match report
< 1 minute readAlex writes: I watched the pre-match sunglasses-fest/pose-athon while tucking into Kashmiri lamb shank rogan josh. Unfortunately, my reluctantly embraced ‘no beer’ policy meant I enjoyed the main event in my room, accompanied by a bottle of Bisleri bottled water. What I like to call “the IPL ad endurance challenge” really
Continue readingIPL third place play-off match report
< 1 minute readAlex writes: Is there any sequence of words in the English language more exciting than ‘third place play-off’? I’m currently working on the horrifying theory that my internal issues might be caused by beer. This is not a theory I’m keen to see proven.
Continue readingDeccan Chargers v Chennai Super Kings, IPL semi final match report
< 1 minute readAlex writes: British Airways have given me the gift of time. First they offered me a flight 10 days after the one that was cancelled. Now, their phone line is so busy I am not even allowed to wait on hold. What to do with this time? I decide to
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