< 1 minute read He is both a cad and a bounder and you should beware his dandy ways. We’d say that Jade was a girl’s name if it were, in fact, a name at all. 24 first-class wickets at 40.62 and somehow he bowled Rob Key first ball. Some facts about Jade Dernbach:
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Tim Bresnan crosses the line
< 1 minute read It’s okay – it’s a good line. It’s the line you have to cross to get written about on King Cricket. Tim Bresnan has been having one of those quietly productive seasons in which our Ones To Watch seem to specialise. Despite having taken more wickets than anyone else in
Continue readingEngland v New Zealand: it’s been…
< 1 minute read …of a lengthy duration. We’re not the kind of cricket site that’s ashamed when we completely overlook an England one-day international and the nineteenth match in a row between England and New Zealand was no time to adopt professionalism. When England were in New Zealand, they won the Tests and
Continue readingKevin Pietersen to captain England
2 minute read Paul Collingwood’s been banned for four matches for England’s slow over rate and Kevin Pietersen‘s picked up the reigns to the haggard, lifeless horse that is the England one-day side. We’re not unhappy about this. We’ve said before that we think Kevin Pietersen would make a half-decent captain. KP said
Continue readingRunning out a player who’s on the deck
< 1 minute read We like a bit of ruthlessness, but there’s a fairly clear line between ‘ruthlessness’ and ‘being a dick’. We call it the ‘being a dick line’ and we always try and stay the right side of it. England didn’t. Ryan Sidebottom went after the ball and inadvertently decked Grant Elliott
Continue readingLast ball finishes are good whatever length the format
< 1 minute read What a great match. What a fantastic finish. One-day cricket’s an idiot – how can it not know that it’s dead? Twenty20 waited for one-day cricket in an Indian backstreet and when one-day cricket arrived, Twenty20 beat it senseless with a black cricket bat. One-day cricket’s bloodied and barely conscious,
Continue readingHalf of England in love with money
< 1 minute read Apparently half of the England team would consider retiring early to play in the IPL. The greedy blighters. How dare they come down on the side of fiscal wealth against such lofty notions as pride, honour and respect. How dare they forfeit the unique opportunity to be slagged off in
Continue readingKevin Pietersen’s ‘new shot’
< 1 minute read Kevin Pietersen said: “That is a new shot, played today” after twice reversing his stance and whopping Scott Styris for six. No it isn’t. It’s batting left-handed. People have been batting left-handed for a while now. It’s a new approach though, even if it’s not a new shot. Is it
Continue readingAndrew Flintoff unveils his big surprise
< 1 minute read “Voila!” Brilliant, Fred. It’s a cricket ball. We’ve all seen a cricket ball before. What’s next in your box of tricks? A bat? A box?
Continue readingDon’t get a cricketer to do your tiling
< 1 minute read Here’s Ravi Bopara trying to do some tiling. Ravi! Stop! Everyone knows that you’re supposed to apply the adhesive to the wall and not to the tile. Now here’s Charlotte Edwards putting up the exact same tile. Q: How many cricketers does it take to put up one tile? A:
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