< 1 minute read As in, it’s the advert featuring Andrew Flintoff, not an advert for Andrew Flintoff. Fred pretty much markets himself. They’re selling off the pedalo for charity as well. We’ve always wanted to own a famous pedalo.
Continue readingCategory: England
Why has Andrew Flintoff retired from Test cricket?
< 1 minute read Have you seen the size of him and the way he bowls? It’s because of that. Andrew Flintoff’s body can get through 30-odd overs in a Test match as easily as it can get through the eye of a needle. We imagine that if you’re Andrew Flintoff, the impact on
Continue readingEngland’s batting collapse in the first Test in Cardiff
< 1 minute read England’s second innings top order batting collapse was pretty piss-poor, but it was just as big a crime to get themselves into that position in the first place. Neither set of bowlers were exceptional in the first Test. The exceptional performance came from Australia’s batsmen, who were sublime. There was
Continue readingMomentum has raised its meaningless head
< 1 minute read If cricketers’ use of the word ‘momentum’ were given physical form, we’d like to meet it. Even if it were an innocent-looking child holding a balloon, we’d still have no qualms about punching it square in the face with all our might. We’d watch the balloon floating skywards and think
Continue readingClose Ashes finishes (and why a draw after five days can be exciting)
< 1 minute read We’ve reached a conclusion. We’re all dead. That’s right. Each and every one of us is dead. But we’ve not gone to heaven. Instead, we’re all stuck in purgatory working off our sins. It’s an Ashes purgatory of inevitable, unendurable tension where Tests are still in the balance right up
Continue readingLeaving the ball as an art form
< 1 minute read Non-cricket fans think the concept of ‘a good leave’ is hilarious, unaware that it’s a mark of the batsman’s decision-making, not his technical ability. Batsmen pride themselves on knowing where their off stumps are, but Kevin Pietersen can’t have felt much pride about knowing his was about eight inches from
Continue readingWhat’s wrong with Simon Jones?
< 1 minute read Those of you who don’t know can probably guess: he’s injured. He had his knee operated on in April and he’ s out for the season. He made it to August last season and that’s about as much cricket as he’s ever managed in one go. So Simon Jones sits
Continue readingGraeme Swann’s joyous bat throwing
< 1 minute read After his lower order skittering, Graeme Swann claimed that Mushtaq Ahmed was his batting mentor. Graeme Swann’s pleasingly unafraid to tell outright lies every now and again, but we think he was serious about this. Mushtaq Ahmed shouldn’t be anybody’s batting mentor. You can’t just find the nearest person who’s
Continue readingKevin Pietersen’s stupid shot
< 1 minute read Not interested. Some say it was irresponsible. Some say it’s the way he plays. This is not the first time people have pored over a Pietersen dismissal. Kevin Pietersen plays a lot of stupid shots. He gets away with almost all of them. His dismissals often look worse than those
Continue readingAshes players to watch tomorrow
2 minute read You might have noticed a certain jaded world-weariness about our recent Ashes coverage as a result of mindless media coverage smotheration. It feels right that we should return to our natural demeanour at a time when everyone else is bouncing about like there’s a lot of bouncing to be done
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