< 1 minute read Not in the sense that they vex you with their occasional incompetence. We mean, are they annoying enough to truly challenge the opposition? We’ve always been a great believer that you can achieve a lot through being really annoying and we don’t see why that wouldn’t apply in international cricket.
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Are England going to win the Ashes?
< 1 minute read What? It’s a simple enough question, isn’t it? Are England going to win the Ashes? The players are all saying that they can. None are saying that they will and obviously none are saying that they won’t. The pundits are weighing things up and talking about pressure and weather and
Continue readingOverly dramatic headline of the week
< 1 minute read The BBC go with “Strauss makes Ashes rallying call”. England’s captain is geeing up the troops with fist-pumping lines such as: “You have to earn the right to be on top in a match and that is why what we did at Headingley was a bit of shocker. We have
Continue readingAndy Flintoff reinstated as Hero Number One
< 1 minute read It’s his last Test, so we’re going back to calling him ‘Andy’. That’s what he always used to be, before the media started calling him ‘Andrew’ and then ‘Freddie’. Andy is a good, functional name. It gets the job done. It’s the kind of name you’d be happy to buy
Continue readingJoe Denly earmarked for summat
< 1 minute read Joe Denly has been picked in England’s Fewer Overs squads for the arse end of the summer. This is pretty good. We get the impression England’s selectors have identified him as an attacking opening batsman who’s actually an opening batsman and not just a sloggy all-rounder who has a bit
Continue readingResponse to England’s fifth Ashes Test squad
< 1 minute read Jonathan Trott, who is being dropped into a deep end infested with piranhas from a great height for his debut, said: “I’m chuffed.” Mark Ramprakash, writing on Twitter, (genuinely) said: “Defecating in a package to send to Geoff Miller.” Quite bizarrely, Trott seemed to echo Ramps’ thoughts when speaking about
Continue readingIs the Australian team better?
< 1 minute read Certainly Australian cricket is better. Look at the players that aren’t even playing: Phil Jaques, Test average 47; Brad Hodge, Test average 56; David Hussey, first-class average 55. That short list can quite easily be extended. The English system produces the odd exceptional player and that’s being generous – more
Continue readingRob Key’s sanguine outlook
< 1 minute read Rob Key’s greatest strength is his don’t-give-a-toss-ishness. It’s the main reason we originally warmed to him, back in the winter of 2002. It’s also why he makes a great captain. We know what you’re thinking: what about that bat-flinging hissy fit on Twenty20 finals day in 2007? That was a
Continue readingFlimsy headline of the week
< 1 minute read From the BBC: “Ramprakash in England contention”. How have they deduced that this is the case? Because when asked about the likelihood of Ramprakash’s selection, England national selector, Geoff Miller, said: “I’m not ruling anybody out.” We’d have gone with “Geoff Capes in England contention” on the grounds that he
Continue readingThe Headingley Test probably didn’t happen
< 1 minute read We sometimes have conversations with friends which go something like this: Us: I was in the pub the other day and I had a terrible pint. I thought there was something wrong with it so I asked the barman to change it. He tasted it and said it was fine,
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