< 1 minute readIt’s well hard to get to play for one of the IPL teams. Look at all the disappointed Englishmen for proof of that. But wait. What’s this? Burt Cockley’s been signed by Kings XI Punjab? Who the hell is Burt Cockley? Burt Cockley’s an Aussie fast bowler. He hasn’t actually
Continue readingCategory: Australia
Bryce McGain’s Australia Test debut
< 1 minute readBryce McGain’s fairytale has been clubbed over wide long-on for six. But we don’t like to judge players on their debuts; it rarely gives a fair reflection of a player’s worth. Who’s worth 0-149 off 18 overs anyway? Any player would be bricking it making their international debut, but consider
Continue readingThe Australia cricket team is utterly gash
< 1 minute readWe’ve been thinking about getting more into reactionary tub thumping of late, so with Australia having been bowled out for 209 by South Africa, we now pronounce them THE WORST CRICKET TEAM IN HISTORY. This is quite the turnabout, considering that only yesterday they were THE BEST CRICKET TEAM IN
Continue readingKent want Stuart Clark fit and firing for the Ashes
< 1 minute readWhy else would Kent sign Stuart Clark other than to help him recover from injury and to help him get a few overs under his belt in English conditions? It’s perfect. How delightfully accommodating of them. In the unlikely event that Kent come up against an England batsman in those
Continue readingPromising English fast bowlers like Sajid Mahmood
2 minute readEngland are generally impatient with promising young players. They bring them in, everyone who can voice an opinion takes it in turns to daub them in excrement and then it takes six years for the smell to wear off. Let’s make a comparison. Sajid Mahmood and Mitchell Johnson were born
Continue readingMitchell Johnson takes England back to the Nineties
< 1 minute readAt one stage South Africa were 6-3, effectively 6-4, as Graeme Smith had been hospitalised. The man who did this was Mitchell Johnson and he forced Jacques Kallis to retire hurt shortly afterwards. Johnson provided bounce, swing and crucially, pace. Mitchell Johnson is a fast bowler. We’d say a ‘genuine’
Continue readingPhil Hughes needs to work on his timing
< 1 minute readPhil Hughes has hit a duck, a fifty and now a hundred. Where does he go next? Well he might want to consider scoring a hundred on a weekday. People do stuff at weekends and his runs might not get as much attention. On a weekday, people come back from
Continue readingNot so statistically aberrant or statistically abhorrent
< 1 minute readWe’ve long had a problem with Mike Hussey’s ludicrous batting average. Finally, after a long wait, South Africa have started dragging it back towards being something more sensible. Hussey now averages 57.11 after 35 Tests, which is still offensive, but not as offensive as hearing the general public give opinions
Continue readingPhil Hughes scores runs when others don’t
< 1 minute readThose of you who haven’t irreparably damaged your memories through inadequate preparation may remember that we told you this about Phil Hughes the day before yesterday. Phil Hughes top-scored for Australia with 75. The next highest score was 37.
Continue readingMitchell Johnson, all-rounder?
< 1 minute readMitchell Johnson, batting at nine, launched the South Africa attack to all parts on his way to 96 not out. He then took 4-25, making light of the fact that Australia have only selected three-and-a-half bowlers. Johnson’s respective averages have just swapped places, so his batting average is now higher
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