< 1 minute readSome of you might have seen that Glamorgan were docked two points for producing a duff pitch. This is at the beautifully monikered Swalec Stadium, where the first Ashes Test is due to take place. ‘Oh no,’ people have said. ‘What if the pitch for the Ashes is sub-standard?’ These
Continue readingCategory: Australia
Deteriorating batting performances late in a career
< 1 minute readMatthew Hayden’s been interviewed. You don’t know how much we’ve missed this. He was asked about his deteriorating batting toward the end of his Test career and, as ever, he’s crystal clear about what happened. “Suddenly questions are asked about your ability and performance, which is absolutely rubbish because your
Continue readingPhillip Hughes in England
< 1 minute readAfter scores of 118, 65 not out and 74 last week, today’s 99 not out marks the moment when we move away from admiring an exceptional young Antipodean talent and towards being sick to the back teeth, the front teeth and tonsils of a winnetty-faced, cork-hatted bastard. Phillip Hughes is
Continue readingMark Cosgrove flobs back into county cricket
< 1 minute readSometimes it’s okay to make use of the verb ‘to flob’. This usage is entirely justified. While the world trains its gaze on Fake IPL Player or the IPL itself – or Ian Bell or Michael Vaughan or Philip Hughes – while the world trains its gaze on those events,
Continue readingBurt Cockley – possible new inexplicable obsession
< 1 minute readIt’s well hard to get to play for one of the IPL teams. Look at all the disappointed Englishmen for proof of that. But wait. What’s this? Burt Cockley’s been signed by Kings XI Punjab? Who the hell is Burt Cockley? Burt Cockley’s an Aussie fast bowler. He hasn’t actually
Continue readingBryce McGain’s Australia Test debut
< 1 minute readBryce McGain’s fairytale has been clubbed over wide long-on for six. But we don’t like to judge players on their debuts; it rarely gives a fair reflection of a player’s worth. Who’s worth 0-149 off 18 overs anyway? Any player would be bricking it making their international debut, but consider
Continue readingThe Australia cricket team is utterly gash
< 1 minute readWe’ve been thinking about getting more into reactionary tub thumping of late, so with Australia having been bowled out for 209 by South Africa, we now pronounce them THE WORST CRICKET TEAM IN HISTORY. This is quite the turnabout, considering that only yesterday they were THE BEST CRICKET TEAM IN
Continue readingKent want Stuart Clark fit and firing for the Ashes
< 1 minute readWhy else would Kent sign Stuart Clark other than to help him recover from injury and to help him get a few overs under his belt in English conditions? It’s perfect. How delightfully accommodating of them. In the unlikely event that Kent come up against an England batsman in those
Continue readingPromising English fast bowlers like Sajid Mahmood
2 minute readEngland are generally impatient with promising young players. They bring them in, everyone who can voice an opinion takes it in turns to daub them in excrement and then it takes six years for the smell to wear off. Let’s make a comparison. Sajid Mahmood and Mitchell Johnson were born
Continue readingMitchell Johnson takes England back to the Nineties
< 1 minute readAt one stage South Africa were 6-3, effectively 6-4, as Graeme Smith had been hospitalised. The man who did this was Mitchell Johnson and he forced Jacques Kallis to retire hurt shortly afterwards. Johnson provided bounce, swing and crucially, pace. Mitchell Johnson is a fast bowler. We’d say a ‘genuine’
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