< 1 minute readFrom the BBC: “Liam Plunkett was cleaned up by Lee for a breezy 34. The dismissal sparked a bizarre incident when a seagull swooped on one of the dislodged bails, escaping with its plunder with Lee in hot pursuit.” Many people would let the bird have the bail and gone
Continue readingCategory: Australia
Is the Australian team better?
< 1 minute readCertainly Australian cricket is better. Look at the players that aren’t even playing: Phil Jaques, Test average 47; Brad Hodge, Test average 56; David Hussey, first-class average 55. That short list can quite easily be extended. The English system produces the odd exceptional player and that’s being generous – more
Continue readingWhat has Luke Pomersbach done?
< 1 minute readRemember Luke Pomersbach? Having been rewarded so handsomely for his piss-artistry 18 months ago, he’s decided that getting wankered is the way forward. After a night drinking the finest wines known to humanity (maybe), Luke Pomersbach hopped into his Toyota Prado and set off. Having ploughed into the back of
Continue readingBooing Ricky Ponting
< 1 minute readGiles Clarke says England fans shouldn’t boo Ricky Ponting. He thinks it shows a lack of respect for a great batsman. He thinks it’s offensive. Well, you can happily discard Giles Clarke and his comments. Giles Clarke likes being photographed next to a big box of money. Not only that,
Continue readingPeter Siddle runs in all day
< 1 minute readThis seems to be Peter Siddle’s greatest strength in the eyes of his team mates. When asked about their bowling attack, Australian players refer to Johnson’s speed, Hilfenhaus’s swing, Clark’s control and Siddle’s ability to run in all day. You don’t want bowlers to run in all day. You want
Continue readingThe Gospel According to Haydos
< 1 minute readDuring his appearances on Test Match Special, Matthew Hayden has rather surprisingly revealed a hitherto concealed ability to talk sense. More reassuringly, he’s also been showcasing his nonsense, which is what we’re more interested in. No-one talks meaningless bollocks quite like Matthew Hayden. Consider the following examples – all from
Continue readingPhil Hughes isn’t playing
< 1 minute readA few weeks ago, back when you couldn’t take a crap without someone knocking on the door and telling you how great he was, we said that Phil Hughes might just be a massive disappointment. Being dropped for Shane Watson is probably classed as disappointing. But don’t worry. The stumpy
Continue readingMitchell Johnson leaves a straight one
< 1 minute readYou couldn’t make it up. Mitchell Johnson LITERALLY doesn’t know what a straight delivery is. James Anderson pointed one towards the stumps and Johnson, alarmed, thought: ‘What the hell is that?’ and padded up. The umpire’s finger rose. Johnson is probably still pondering this exotic trickery now; planning how he’ll
Continue readingShane Watson throws England’s bowlers
< 1 minute readYou’ve got to feel for England’s bowlers. How were they supposed to react to Shane Watson? They prepare themselves for bowling at stubbly-faced munchkin, Phil Hughes, but against all expectation are suddenly confronted with a creepy-looking, gym-bodied albino instead. It must be like bowling at a fearful ghost. Not the
Continue readingGraham Manou’s playing
< 1 minute readIt’s entirely in keeping with Graham Manou’s unremarkable tour that it took us until 6pm to realise he was actually playing. Considering the Australian players with most column inches have been Phil Hughes and Mitchell Johnson, low-key Manou might be a cause for concern. We know that he’s a wicketkeeper,
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