< 1 minute readAndrew Flintoff should keep a close eye on all his cricket gear. Stuart Broad will have his bats, his pads and even his box given half a chance. He’s not waiting until the big man’s gone before taking over. When Swann got North, we yelped like a female coati. When
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Ian Ronald Bell and his ‘stache
< 1 minute readIan Bell appears to have a bit of a moustache at the minute. If there were such a thing as a “my middle name’s Ronald” moustache, this would be it.
Continue readingAre England annoying enough?
< 1 minute readNot in the sense that they vex you with their occasional incompetence. We mean, are they annoying enough to truly challenge the opposition? We’ve always been a great believer that you can achieve a lot through being really annoying and we don’t see why that wouldn’t apply in international cricket.
Continue readingAre England going to win the Ashes?
< 1 minute readWhat? It’s a simple enough question, isn’t it? Are England going to win the Ashes? The players are all saying that they can. None are saying that they will and obviously none are saying that they won’t. The pundits are weighing things up and talking about pressure and weather and
Continue readingOverly dramatic headline of the week
< 1 minute readThe BBC go with “Strauss makes Ashes rallying call”. England’s captain is geeing up the troops with fist-pumping lines such as: “You have to earn the right to be on top in a match and that is why what we did at Headingley was a bit of shocker. We have
Continue readingAndy Flintoff reinstated as Hero Number One
< 1 minute readIt’s his last Test, so we’re going back to calling him ‘Andy’. That’s what he always used to be, before the media started calling him ‘Andrew’ and then ‘Freddie’. Andy is a good, functional name. It gets the job done. It’s the kind of name you’d be happy to buy
Continue readingJoe Denly earmarked for summat
< 1 minute readJoe Denly has been picked in England’s Fewer Overs squads for the arse end of the summer. This is pretty good. We get the impression England’s selectors have identified him as an attacking opening batsman who’s actually an opening batsman and not just a sloggy all-rounder who has a bit
Continue readingResponse to England’s fifth Ashes Test squad
< 1 minute readJonathan Trott, who is being dropped into a deep end infested with piranhas from a great height for his debut, said: “I’m chuffed.” Mark Ramprakash, writing on Twitter, (genuinely) said: “Defecating in a package to send to Geoff Miller.” Quite bizarrely, Trott seemed to echo Ramps’ thoughts when speaking about
Continue readingIs the Australian team better?
< 1 minute readCertainly Australian cricket is better. Look at the players that aren’t even playing: Phil Jaques, Test average 47; Brad Hodge, Test average 56; David Hussey, first-class average 55. That short list can quite easily be extended. The English system produces the odd exceptional player and that’s being generous – more
Continue readingRob Key’s sanguine outlook
< 1 minute readRob Key’s greatest strength is his don’t-give-a-toss-ishness. It’s the main reason we originally warmed to him, back in the winter of 2002. It’s also why he makes a great captain. We know what you’re thinking: what about that bat-flinging hissy fit on Twenty20 finals day in 2007? That was a
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