< 1 minute readThe theme of Twenty20 Finals Day 2009 was The Magnificent Seven on account of it being the seventh Twenty20 Finals Day. They played music from westerns, there was a bucking bronco thing and there were cowgirls. Between the second semi and the final, the entire Edgbaston crowd recreated the campfire
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Response to England’s fifth Ashes Test squad
< 1 minute readJonathan Trott, who is being dropped into a deep end infested with piranhas from a great height for his debut, said: “I’m chuffed.” Mark Ramprakash, writing on Twitter, (genuinely) said: “Defecating in a package to send to Geoff Miller.” Quite bizarrely, Trott seemed to echo Ramps’ thoughts when speaking about
Continue readingChris Adams commentating on Twenty20 Finals Day
< 1 minute readWe’re not convinced. “He’s doing exactly what it says on the tin. Bowling straight; wicket to wicket.” You can’t use ‘does what it says on the tin’ wherever you like. There are rules. You can’t say: “I’m doing exactly what it says on the tin: I’m stopping in with a
Continue readingFourth 2009 Ashes Test match report
2 minute readSW writes: It was agreed that The Australian and myself would enjoy a weekend of camping up at Peterborough with our acquaintance Price and some other lycra-clad rowing folk. There was rumour of naked rowing, pole climbing and general debauchery being on the cards, so this seemed like a good
Continue readingIs the Australian team better?
< 1 minute readCertainly Australian cricket is better. Look at the players that aren’t even playing: Phil Jaques, Test average 47; Brad Hodge, Test average 56; David Hussey, first-class average 55. That short list can quite easily be extended. The English system produces the odd exceptional player and that’s being generous – more
Continue readingRob Key’s sanguine outlook
< 1 minute readRob Key’s greatest strength is his don’t-give-a-toss-ishness. It’s the main reason we originally warmed to him, back in the winter of 2002. It’s also why he makes a great captain. We know what you’re thinking: what about that bat-flinging hissy fit on Twenty20 finals day in 2007? That was a
Continue readingMan dresses as cowboy for money
< 1 minute readIt’s Dwayne Smith and it’s one of the half-hourly Mongoose cricket bat press releases we receive. We have a friend who had to be photographed as a cowboy once. We won’t say why. Not because it’s sinister, but because it sounds sinister if we leave the reason to your imagination.
Continue readingOld Trafford Twenty20 match report
3 minute readMahinda writes: It was a grey day in Manchestie when my motley crew headed to Old Trafford for an evening’s Twenty20 – Lankyshire versus Zummerrrrrrzet in a T20 Cup quarter-final. I’d organised a work-subsidised social. Workmate Andy had even brought his mother and two of his daughters along. We’d all
Continue readingWhat has Luke Pomersbach done?
< 1 minute readRemember Luke Pomersbach? Having been rewarded so handsomely for his piss-artistry 18 months ago, he’s decided that getting wankered is the way forward. After a night drinking the finest wines known to humanity (maybe), Luke Pomersbach hopped into his Toyota Prado and set off. Having ploughed into the back of
Continue readingFlimsy headline of the week
< 1 minute readFrom the BBC: “Ramprakash in England contention”. How have they deduced that this is the case? Because when asked about the likelihood of Ramprakash’s selection, England national selector, Geoff Miller, said: “I’m not ruling anybody out.” We’d have gone with “Geoff Capes in England contention” on the grounds that he
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