We’ve heard that he might be moving to Surrey. That isn’t official, but we figure that if we aren’t going to publish rumours about Rob Key, we might as well just jack it all in and take up ice skating.
Much as we’d love to glide majestically across the rink while Danger Zone from the Top Gun soundtrack blared out in the background, we’ve decided to take the more obvious route.
Should Rob Key move to Surrey? No. Surrey are shit – the second worst side in county cricket, to be precise – whereas Kent are going back to Division One. Surrey are rich however, so a move there would be an admission that Rob will never play for England again and also say that he’s content to see out his career in slightly better remunerated obscurity.
If there are people out there who think you deserve a vehicle as if you’re a member of the Hindu pantheon, then you owe it to them to do better than that.
NO NO NO NO NO.
That is all.
Latest word on the London street – unlikely.
Sarah, rest assured.
This cannot and must not happen.
But I thought we’d just had the post that was full of wank?
£150,000 a season’s hard to turn down, even if it does mean playing for the second worst side in county cricket
If he does it, I hope there’s a suitable angry gif file coming.
It’ll never happen.
But hell, I hope it does!