West Indian cricketer name generator

Posted by
< 1 minute read

We have devised a simple method for generating the name that someone would have were they a West Indian cricketer. After extensive testing (two people) we felt it stood up to scrutiny and we were about to ‘go public’ when we asked a third person.

Using our methodology, his West Indian cricketer name quite genuinely came out as “George Headley” and that pretty much sealed it for us.

So, to find out your West Indian cricketer name, simply take your mother’s maiden name and add the town of your birth. That’s it.

Our name, were we a West Indian cricketer, would be Harris Crewe and our workmate’s would be Duffy Solihull. We can easily imagine that pair opening the bowling. However, we admit this method probably won’t work so well if you were born outside the UK. Sorry about that. But try it anyway.

SIGN UP FOR THE KING CRICKET EMAIL!

Or WG Grace and Billy Murdoch will be forced to come round your house and...

... do things...

120 comments

  1. Foxall Leytonstone. Not sure that is a Windies name. More likely to be one of those gentlemen batsmen of the 19th century whose only Test appearance was as England captain

    1. Harris Crewe would certainly have represented the West Indies more often, if he hadn’t been kept out of the side by his brother, Willis.

  2. Sullivan Billinge.

    Not sure about the surname, but I’d be amazed if there aren’t at least seven Sullivan Somethings playing for WI in the next decade.

  3. Vink Laren

    Nope, not working for anyone outside the UK. But I can Englishify (or West-Indiesify) it a bit:

    Finch McLaren

    Could work…

  4. I can definitely imagine Rendle Ashford holding down his place in the middle order for some time.

  5. I have also heard of different vatiations of this, including your place of birth followed by your middle name and the surname of the american presidant who was in power when you were born followed by your place of birth. This would give me the following variations:

    Herzog Sevenoaks
    Sevenoaks Williams (I added the S as it sounds better)
    Reagan Sevenoaks

  6. Stewart Stirling. Sounds like, for Scots, this might more like a New Zealand cricket name generator.

  7. I’m the younger brother of the three – Cavanagh Crewe. perhaps I’ll be called upon by my big brother to bowl underarm at a crucial moment and so live in infamy in the cricketing world.

  8. I believe Nixon Alexei Mcnamra McClean (of Evenwood CC and West Indies)’s parents applied part of Price’s method, so we could end up with a circular reference (or something).

    Naylor Wisbech by the way.

    1. What would happen if a West Indian cricketer tried to find out what his West Indian cricketer name was? Would the universe implode?

  9. I am unbelievably happy with McCormick Hastings. Surely a slightly iffy keeper, if ever I heard of one.

    1. “And that’s a bad miss from McCormick Hastings. Rendle Ashford’s livid about that.”

  10. Vivian Hexham – but I cannot imagine a great West Indian cricketer being called Vivian as a first name. That would be absurd.

    1. “Mindless batting from Hatfield Babylon. He’s left his team in real trouble now. Sullivan Billinge will have strong words for him when he gets back to the dressing room.”

  11. This is just a thinly veiled attempt to survey where your readers are from in an attempt to geographically optimize the adverts, isn’t it?

    Anyway, mine’s Johnson Leicester. I see my brother Wilde’s already chipped in.

  12. In addition to your mothers maiden name, there is a lot of fun to be had by supplying the following details about yourself:

    NAME OF YOUR FIRST SCHOOL

    WHERE YOU WERE BORN

    WHERE YOUR MOTHER WAS BORN

    WHERE YOUR FATHER WAS BORN

    NAME OF YOUR FIRST PET

    INTERNET BANKING USER NAME

    INTERNET BANKING PASSWORD

    PIN NUMBER

  13. But using my grandmother’s maiden name (which I never use for passwords or financial stuff):

    Krasey Camberwell

    Not bad.

  14. Yes, I will use my grandmother’s and father’s data for this, which gives me the wonderful

    Simons Leytonstone.

  15. You can do it with real cricketers as well. Andrew Strauss becomes Smythe-Fotheringhamshawe Thecolonies.

  16. None of these names have an Indian ring to it. Where are the Baraths, the Shivnaraines, the Ramadhins and the Kalicharans? Sorry to burst your bubble, KC, but this generator is an epic swing and a miss.

    1. Who says it doesn’t work for those outside the UK? I am Gauri Nagpore, which sounds 100% Trinidadian.

      (Ok, so I have used the Raj-era spelling of the town, but that is precisely when the Indo-trinis left home)

  17. If you do Kyle Hogg the Ged (using grandparents’ names) way, you get Ramadhin (Sunny) Birmingham, addressing Deep Cower’s fundamental problem to boot.

    Someone should pay me to solve all these problems.

  18. Yeah, this isn’t going to work very well in America, considering my alter ego is Carlson Minneapolis. Very much more a travel company than an opening batsman.

    1. That’s only slightly better than Dodda Ganesh. You’ll spend all your cricketing life carrying water and towel to Ged’s Ramadhin (Sunny) Birmingham.

  19. Smith Solihull – doesn’t quite work, but with my grandmother’s maiden name – Marshall Solihull. Much better.

  20. Fitton Oldham.
    Great. I’ll now put accents to words of everyone who has posted on this thread.

    1. Nah, we like that one. Garratt Walsall comes on first-change, but is actually quicker than the two opening bowlers.

  21. I’d be (using the first formula) Lovett Pontypool, (second formula) Lovett Gerard or (third formula) Reagan Pontypool.

    1. However, changing it to where I spent my formative years gives me the rather-better Lovett Headington.

    1. We’re not going to pick until we’ve seen the full talent pool.

      One thing’s for sure though, this side will be unbeatable.

  22. Smart Bristol – nah, don’t like it, not even drinks carrier.
    Mr CowPoncho, however, produces Waddington Rotherham, any potential?

  23. Mr CowPoncho certainly bats a bit. He has modelled his batting mindset on that of Sir Geoffrey (or Speight Fitzwilliam according to your generator and Wikipedia)

  24. A disappointingly implausible “Fearn Loughborough.”

    a better result is obtained from the generation-shift formula – “Harris Chesterfield”.

    The much more widely-know version of this generator is to use the US President of the year you were born, followed by the street on which you grew up, in which case mine is Clinton Parks.

    1. I’ve been misinformed. Should be Bush. Never rely on your housemates for information, wikipedia far superior.

    1. Buttsworth Subiaco. You’d have to find room for him in the team, no matter what his limitations.

      Buttsworth Subiaco.

  25. Seymour Plymouth

    I see Seymour as 20-20 wicketkeeper. Neither keeping nor batting up to Test standard, but can (occasionally) produce a rapid-fire fifty. A West Indian Craig Kieswetter.

    Talking of which, how about separate teams for Tests, one days and 20-20?

  26. Copley Fremantle

    Great fielder and useful spin bowler but threw his wicket away too often.

  27. Bradley Lancaster: erratic fast bowler, and one of those amusing swing-wildly-at-everthing tail end batsmen.

  28. Golightly Aberystwyth.

    No more plausible than Cranford Aberystwyth, though it does sound like a ballad.

    My mother is Roy Valetta, a private dick if ever I heard one.

    1. Can’t believe how many siblings there are. Our readership seems to originate in pockets around the country.

  29. You can use British Prime Ministers instead of US presidents. That way, Daisy produces the formidable Eden Chamberlayne, who is unquestionably a pace bowler of some ferocity. Surely one of the first names on the team sheet.

    Using the same method, I yield the lacklustre Macmillan Woodfield or his US-facing brother Kennedy Woodfield. Sadly, both of mine are cricketers who promise far more than they deliver – Kennedy in particular plays a couple of eye-catching T20 innings and then he vanishes without trace. Not even in the mix for selection IMHO.

  30. Slightly disappointed with Todd Farnborough. The missus comes up as Heaney Dunfermline though, which for some reason makes me chuckle.

  31. And Buttsworth Subiaco brings up his hundred with a lofted drive for six over extra cover.

  32. After giving most serious and protracted consideration to all methods, my favoured contribution is Wilson Alexander (British pm + street). Think this rather trumps the frankly disappointing Hodge Canterbury/Page Canterbury efforts (grandmother’s maiden names -using my mother’s isn’t any more satisfactory, sadly).

    I must be honest, I’m feeling Potential Performance Squad at best after this exercise, KC.

  33. Goodall Coventry – possibly the first time ‘good’ and ‘Coventry’ have been used together?

  34. Wallace Weston-Super-Mare? I’d certainly be interested to see how the TV coverage would abbreviate the name, anyway…

  35. Actually, if I go with the hospital I become Mathews Treliske.

    Still not as good as string’s mind.

  36. My father would be Collins Croydon, which has a certain ring to it, but mine would be very silly indeed. Even reversed it is daft, Amersham Biltcliffe.

  37. Rather late to the game, but thought i’d chip in! Buist Darfield, dashing young all-rounder whose career was tragically cut short by injury.

  38. ‘Domingo Bangalore’ & in the tradition of solid Indo/Windies cricketers, holds up that no. 5/6 batting position (aka. A. Kallicharan) to ensure there is no respite once the top order has pilled on 350+!!!

Comments are closed.