Before the fourth one-dayer between Australia and England, the at times nauseatingly partisan BT Sport Twitter account asked which of three England batsmen would “go big” – Jason Roy, Joe Root or Jos Buttler.
✅ Roy
✅ Root
✅ ButtlerWho will be the man to go big tonight?
???? BT Sport 1 HD
???? 3ampic.twitter.com/SwTbpFVFub— Cricket on BT Sport (@btsportcricket) January 25, 2018
After 6.2 overs, the answer was clear – Joe Root, whose seven-ball duck was significantly larger than the two-ball ducks notched by Roy and Buttler.
‘Plenty of batting to come’ is a commentary cliché that can be deployed almost throughout an England one-day innings, but even they couldn’t afford to lose half their wickets for eight runs.
Australia did at least try and make a complete balls-up of their chase, but sadly couldn’t finish the job.
Update: It’s since been pointed out to us that the BT tweet is actually a tick list, not a series of options. We’re not editing this though. We’re going to leave our idiocy on full display because by this point in life we no longer care that we’re stupid.
It’s… substantially less funny to suggest that BT Sport was checking off the men who had already ‘gone big’ this series, and asking who the next one would be, isn’t it.
Ah, now we understand.
Is that what people do? They tick off performances and then only the people who haven’t yet performed are eligible to ‘go big’.
Well, they are the only ones that are due so it seems reasonable
Woakes has already gone biggish, so they were wrong anyway.
What odds can you get on England winning the 2019 World Cup?
I think you can get 4/1 in some places, Australia look to be about the same.
Pakistan are 12/1 – I wouldn’t like to be the person responsible for estimating the probability of any future outcome relating to the Pakistan cricket team.
Parenthood.
I think it’s a combination of two things. Firstly, you feel that to some extent the job has been done. You’ve delivered your genetic code, with all its flaws, to the future, so you can sit back relax.
Secondly, you realise that the very last thing you can do is sit back and relax. Not for twenty years at the very least. You understand that your hormones have duped you into this procreation lark, and you now accept that you are less intelligent than a few carefully built chemicals.
Innit.