2 minute readWe’re not in the habit of paying much heed to public pronouncements from cricketers. You can say what you like. It’s not the same as actually doing something. We could say that we beat Thor at chess yesterday, but it’s transparently a lie. We would never play chess. However, we
Continue readingMonth: January 2009
Butt cracks balls and more
< 1 minute readWe dread to think what search engine traffic we’re going to get from that title, but you can’t sashay through life being called ‘Butt’ without some sort of consequences. It’ll teach some visitors the importance of the humble comma at any rate. Prior to the first one-day international against Sri
Continue readingHaydos: gone but not forgotten
< 1 minute readIn many ways, Matthew ‘Haydos’ Hayden is irreplaceable. Not his batting, obviously, Aussie opening batsmen are ten-a-penny. We’re thinking more about his way with words and the way he never lets the faintest whiff of self awareness enter his consciousness. What was your career highlight, Haydos? “Singing the team song
Continue readingShaun Marsh wants to play straighter
< 1 minute readShaun Marsh said he wanted to play straighter after making 79 in Australia’s win over South Africa. How much straighter does he want to play? Now granted, we slept through a good deal of his innings, but from what we did see Marsh’s batting was straighter than Chuck Norris doing
Continue readingMurali’s batting
< 1 minute readMurali’s always had a certain approach to batting. Have a ruddy great swing at the ball Miss Have an even bigger swing at the next one Usually this method fails for reasons that are fairly clear even to Murali. Occasionally it doesn’t and he hits 33 off 16 balls to
Continue readingEngland v South Africa fourth Test match report
2 minute readPrice writes: I had taken the Monday off work to allow us to watch some Test Cricket at bargain bucket prices. My Cornish friend who lives in Wiltshire came up on the Sunday. We prayed for rain and the rain duly arrived. In celebration that we would get some play
Continue readingMonty Panesar’s bowling speed
< 1 minute readPeople say that Monty Panesar bowls too fast and that he doesn’t adapt. People say that he’s a mindless idiot who hasn’t got the potential to develop his game. He’s not moved on as most England supporters would have liked, but people have been going a bit overboard. There’s nothing
Continue readingShakib Al Hasan twangs another bow string
< 1 minute readHow many strings does Shakib Al Hasan’s bow have? Predictably and disappointingly, he has two strings to his bow: batting and bowling. This is not an especially large number of strings, but it’s two more than we have. We haven’t even got a bow – or if we have, we
Continue readingCat renounces indifference to cricket
< 1 minute readLemon Bella writes: StraussCat has been waiting for another chance to show how much he doesn’t care about English cricket. KP provided him with the perfect opportunity. This is StraussCat when he first heard the news that Pietersen had resigned. When I told him that the only viable candidate was
Continue readingMatthew Hayden’s gone
2 minute read“Matthew Hayden’s gone” was our favourite piece of commentary as well as being our way of announcing his retirement. We’re usually quite generous with our retirement posts. Not today. Matthew Hayden was a batsman in the right place at the right time. He was also an arrogant turd. Essentially though,
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