2 minute readSoviet Onion writes: I returned from a holiday in Sri Lanka last week, and within minutes of getting home I did what I usually do after work and went through lots of pages on Teletext (does anyone else still do this?). On page 354 I noticed upcoming cricket fixtures –
Continue readingMonth: July 2008
Andrew Flintoff playing for England
< 1 minute readWe were hugely, hugely impressed with Graeme Smith and Neil McKenzie in the Lord’s Test. We don’t care what the pitch was like – just imagine coming out to bat after you’ve been so comprehensively trampled for three days. Imagine what would have happened to England in the same situation.
Continue readingMark Pougatch on TMS
< 1 minute readWe’ve nothing against Mark Pougatch personally, but he doesn’t bring a great deal to Test Match Special. It smacks of the Manish Bhasin debacle during the Ashes and the World Cup. On the plus side, at least he doesn’t sound like some throwback to the British Raj, unlike some of
Continue readingThe India itinerary – good and also rubbish
2 minute readEngland tour India over the winter. They play two Tests, which is clearly too few. They will also play seven one-day internationals, which is clearly a huge waste of everyone’s time. You can’t blame India. The last time England toured, the Test series was drawn while the one-dayers were so
Continue readingMohammad Asif is a dick
< 1 minute readThat was what we wrote as a little aide memoire to ourself and we see no reason not to use it as the title of this post. Mohammad Asif has again tested positive for ‘banned substances’. Rumour has it that traces of finest unobtainium showed up in his urine. Unobtainium
Continue readingWhat could be better than Ian Bell’s 199?
< 1 minute readIan Bell’s innings of 199 against South Africa was better than waking up on a Saturday thinking it’s a Monday and then realising the truth. It was better than hearing the phone ring and picking it up only to hear a dialling tone. It was even better than being asleep.
Continue readingRavi Bopara does even more DIY
< 1 minute readIf you’re tired of updates about an indifferent Ravi Bopara helping to promote Nuts magazine via a National Shed Week PR stunt, then you might want to stop reading now. Because here’s Ravi standing outside a shed with his drill and his barbecue and also his rake: We’re hungry by
Continue readingKevin Pietersen likes an occasion
< 1 minute readThat was as good as a certainty, wasn’t it? Kevin Pietersen likes a big match. He must be driven by stomach butterflies or something. We’re not quite sure how that would work, because even our rudimentary scientific knowledge tells us that there aren’t actually butterflies in there. He went out
Continue readingThe only story of today’s play
< 1 minute readRealistically, there was only one story from today’s play. We’re talking of course of Jacques Kallis’s new ‘comfortable’ appearance. Now we like a fat cricketer as much as the next man – maybe even more than the next man – but we don’t appreciate Jacques Kallis’s late-to-the-party attempts. Our idea
Continue readingEngland will win
2 minute readNot at Lord’s, obviously. That’ll be a rain-affected draw like usual. England will win the series though. Why? Because it’s tricky playing in England. England supporters don’t realise this sometimes, but it is. Conditions are as tricky and alien to most nations’ players as Sri Lankan or Indian conditions are
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