< 1 minute readFor some reason New Zealand demoted Tim Southee from number nine to number ten in their second innings. Southee was clearly irked by this and promptly hit New Zealand’s fastest-ever Test fifty in a magnificent display powered by THE RAGE. England’s fielders thought they were being clever when Southee came
Continue readingMonth: March 2008
Marcus Trescothick’s international retirement
2 minute readThere’s no point dwelling on it, because he’s never going to play for England again, but there’s a fair chance that Marcus Trescothick is still England’s best batsman. Kevin Pietersen’s record may look a little better, but he doesn’t have to face the new ball. Marcus Trescothick was so good
Continue readingStephen Fleming finishes with a pair of fifties
< 1 minute readEverybody else is saying it, so why shouldn’t we? How apt that Stephen Fleming should retire with a fifty in each innings. In total he hit 46 in Test cricket, but only nine hundreds. Statistics might not tell the whole story, but there’s only the odd semi-colon missing in this
Continue readingAndrew Strauss gets the job done with BIG RUNS
2 minute readThere are two sides to this, being as we’re English, we’re first going to concentrate on the negative, because that’s our knee-jerk response when our side have made a comprehensive fightback and put themselves in total control of a Test match. Andrew Strauss shouldn’t have been playing. He shouldn’t have
Continue readingRyan Sidebottom takes 7-47
< 1 minute readA week or so ago, we wondered whether Steve Harmison’s underlying lack of confidence was the result of not feeling like he’d earned his place in the England team. With six years and hundreds of first-class wickets between his first and second Test appearances, Ryan Sidebottom must feel the opposite.
Continue readingEngland’s top six are going to make BIG RUNS
< 1 minute readWord is they’re all hitting it well in the nets. Confidence is rising. Big scores are due. With players of their class, hundreds are just around the corner. As soon as one batsman cashes in, the floodgates will open. Because that’s the way it works. All batsmen have got a
Continue readingA Matthew Hayden quote shorn of context to make it sound weird
< 1 minute readWe’re not in the habit of being even-handed when it comes to Hayden. Why should we extend the courtesy of context to him when he never once apologises for being Matthew Hayden. “At the end of the day, two alpha dogs are never going to sit in a cage and
Continue readingLess tweediness from Strauss’s team mates
< 1 minute readRemember how Andrew Strauss was going to GET THE JOB DONE? Ceci sent more pictures, saying: “Squire Hoggard and the chav Vaughan. KP however will always be an alien life form to me. I’d like to say the rough edges are there as an ironic statement, but of course I
Continue readingMiracle Hair restoral
< 1 minute readMaybe it’s not a miracle, but you don’t spurn headlines like that, even if they are more obvious than the correlation between mobile phone advertising and incidences of depression. Darrell Hair has been restored to the Elite Panel of ICC Umpires. It sounds like he’s just going to see out
Continue readingWe’re in The Wisden Cricketer!
2 minute readThe Wisden Cricketer’s a proper, grown-up publication. Look, it’s actually tangible! Here’s the bit where it says that it’s “the world’s no.1 cricket magazine”. And here’s us! No, really. Look! And here’s Monty being conspicuously indifferent to it. Turning away OR closing your eyes would have been sufficient, young man.
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